I'm "reprinting" what follows from my brand-new Blogger blog:  100 Blogs in 365 Days.  It's going to serve as the "process blog" for my microniche-blogging journey.  Fingers crossed...the only failure lies in not trying, right?

Perfectionism.  It'll kill ya.  The very first blog I ever set up was, in tribute to the poet T.S. Eliot, titled, "Visions and Revisions."  Umm, the title turned out to be sadly prophetic.  I ended up doing so many revisions to my vision on just the very first post that nothing ever did get published on that poetically titled platform.

Sigh.  Adoring T.S. Eliot's "The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock" is well and good.  But Prufrock should not be anyone's role model.  "I grow old, I grow old--I shall wear the bottoms of my trousers rolled...."  And "Do I dare disturb the universe?"

I don't know why I have so often found myself paralyzed by perfectionism--but there you have it.  It's my own personal demon.  A demon that sometimes feels like a muse--because, I admit, there are times when that push to be perfect leads to some stellar results.

But here's where I find myself right now, as I celebrate the 21st birthday of my oldest child, sign divorce papers from a 20-year marriage, and prepare to turn 45.  And as I reflect on too many ideas and inspirations that have been silenced by anxious perfectionism. 

I am looking for my own success on my own terms.  And it is a success that includes the following:

• Enough income to support myself and my kids.

• A home-based business success that might serve as a role model to my children--particularly my daughters.

• Enough variety to satisfy my very restless mind.

• The sense of accomplishment that comes from having built something of value--something that provides ongoing residual income.  (Truth be told, I am moving toward that particular goal in the realm of actual physical real estate too.  More and more, I see brick-and-mortar real estate as having lots and lots in common with "virtual real estate."  And it's a good time to invest in both!)

I have a writing business, and it's not going too badly.  But I get to the end of a full day of writing for other people--and I think to myself, "Wow, I'm pretty sure my brainpower just helped other people become more successful."  And I have nothing against helping other people with their success--but you see, it's hard work for not very much money.

I'd rather do the work and let it make ME money.  And I know I can do it.

So, to that end, I've been very patiently researching for months now how to pull this off.  That's where perfectionism can come in handy (sort of).  Because I count the cost and research my projects pretty carefully before I just jump in. 

So here''s the thing: I know full well there's nothing original about my goals.  The only thing that's original here is my particular mix of talents.  I can write, code, teach myself just about anything, slap up websites, and schmooze.  Tirelessly, I might add.  And with the patience of a woman who has spent half of her life raising four children.

In the next post, I'll tell you where my zeal has led me--and what my preparation has been for this "100 blogs in 365 days" project. Stay tuned!  And thanks for reading.

~ Felicity

(a.k.a. Maureen :-)